Wednesday, June 3, 2009
i was just wondering on how great my life will be if problems are out and living life as pernormal are in. im tired & i hate this thing. im all drench with my tears allover & i couldnt bear this any longer. & im supposed to be happy but yet, im not even happy for one bit!i dont know what else to do to make the situation even better than before. i dont even get any chance to even voice out all the feelings & thoughts inside me. i encounter problems, yes. even if im able to, i dare not to as they may say that im being rude & rebellious. ive stop all those nonsensical stuff that ive been doing all awhile. ive also gave up almost everything just for you Bitches. what more do you want from me? i may not be the person whom you expected me to be. im sorry abt that but now, why are you putting up all this problems? why?! i cant say that i hate you Bitches as you are the reason im born being able to breath & even cry. i was born not to be perfect. but dont you think that i am who i am today bcause of what you did last time? people say that whatever personality you have or anything, it always have something related to thier parents. & now, you are blaming me & saying that im your worse? whats that huh?! ive tried almost everything to make you smile each day but now, im unable to do it as im so weak due to your presence & words. i cant bear to look at you &smile to you like i did daily last time. now, i had to admit that everything had change. i felt like im a prisoner as that is how you treat me. im always in my room, not socialising with anybody in the house. im the one who is crying here & waiting for someone to wipe off this tears but why isn't there anybody? & i have not even eat anything since the start of the day. i had no appetite. i hate my life now all thanks to you Bitches! i know that you know that im suffering alone here. But why couldnt you understand me even one bit? instead, you are having wild thoughts towards me! what makes you a good Bitch?! i guess nobody understands me cus even you Don't! im young and there is still so many days to come and for me to live my life! but yet, you are stoping everything! what kind of a person do you want me to be?! huh?! i feel like life is meaningless alrdy. there's no perfect reason for me to continue this anymore. if i were to be away some day, dont blame yourself nor anybody. please. its my decision okay. out of this world is the best thing that i could ever think off now. but im reconsidering. Nobody needs me now as im always the one who is giving problems. dont worry abt me.
Dont even think about putting up a search party when im away.
Labels: senseless.
Deela's Ending || Wednesday, June 03, 2009
