Thursday, June 4, 2009
( see this girl above, i miss her past times )
i was able to get out of this house just now in the morning. & yes, i cried as usual. i hate this thing that is happening arnd me. dad took my handphone away & yeah, i objected. but what can i do since he was way too strong compared to me. a mark of his gribs was seen on my arm. this is torture to me. why wouldnt they understand that im having a hard time & they expect me to concentrat on my studies while this is happening. i want my past. i want to avoid all this shits. please! im weaker than i ever thought that i would be. please make me like before. please make me happy. please help me. please, im begging you. dont take everything away from me. dont take my happiness. dont take my freedom. dont take my smiles. dont take anything from me. i just had enough. i couldnt stand this any longer, please. how long do i have to go through this? how much longer? im speechless alrdy. thank god that i still have friends that loves me. thank god that im still able to smile. thank god that natty told me not to do stupid stuffs. thank god for not letting any bad things to occur. thank god for everything. alhamdulillah.
ooh Allah, help me overcome this things that is happening. make me a stronger girl than i could ever be. show me the right path to take. give me any signs that could help me improve the situation. i know that i have done many sins towards my parents. ya Allah. im beeging you. this minute, im praying so hard. forgive me .
i just want my past back to come alive. if this continues, im gonna be dead sooner or later. but i know that im stronger than i think. pray hard. crying is not going to do any better. & im lucky to have a sister that i know who loves & understands me. im save for now.
Labels: not to worry
Deela's Ending || Thursday, June 04, 2009
